Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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