And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
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