Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I'm like, not good at living.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
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