Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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