Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
