I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
