Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
