If i come over, it means nothing
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize
