You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
