Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
did i walk over a car last night?
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
