Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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