who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
