Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Randomize