she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
