I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
