Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize