dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
