i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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