I smell stomach acid.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
