Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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