There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
