Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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