New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Randomize
