But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
