She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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