I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
