it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
My balls are so social today.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize