were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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