Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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