doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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