You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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