Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
how drunk are you?
Several
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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