I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
