My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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