i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
