I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Randomize
