The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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