I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
