so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
