Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
please don't ironically join a cult
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