Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Randomize
