he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
