Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Drake has all the answers
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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