We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
