You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
