after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
