So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
