Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Randomize
