Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
