don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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