Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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