I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Randomize
